School? WHAT IS THAT?!

Today I pulled into my driveway after a ten-hour drive home from Tampa. The drive signified the "death of summer" so to speak. Let's face it: it's pretty much over. Camp ended 12 days ago, but that wasn't really THE end, because I still had our fantastic staff vacation to Florida coming up. And it WAS fantastic. But, alas: it's over.

*stamps feet and whines* It's ovvvveeeerrrrr! 

I'll try to write more about our Florida trip later, but that's not why I brought you here. I brought you here to try to describe the rush of foreshadowing I felt as I unloaded my heavy suitcase from the car. I was tired- nay, exhausted. My back ached. The sun was too bright. Replace the suitcase with a crammed backpack and it could practically be me two weeks from now, trekking home after my first week of classes, exhausted from getting to know a new campus, new classmates, new groove.

See, it's been a year since I participated religiously in "the daily grind" of academia. It's hard to remember that once, in the near distant past, I too was one of those, what are they called...?

STUDENTS.

Yuck! Poor things. I was one of them?! I marched about campus from class to class, assignment to assignment, test to test?! I sat at a DESK? For HOURS?!

Dear Lord - yes - THAT WAS MY LIFE. My whole life! At one point, I was safely secure in my 15th consecutive year of education. I was on track. Actually, I was exactly like one of those little metal cars on a plastic racetrack. My momentum kept me going over every hill I encountered. But then last September happened, and Fate's giant ugly foot came and kicked me across the cold tile.

I mean, it was a good thing. I spent a year working various jobs, reconnecting with friends, traveling to air force bases, READING, and throwing myself into new hobbies (LIKE THIS BLAHG!).

But... now... it's time to get "back on track". And simply put:

I have no momentum. 

So, it's going to be a bit tough. Oftentimes, when I drift into daydreams of the coming school year, I envision myself flouncing around campus in a flattering beige peacoat with perfect hair and red lipstick, or perhaps perching delicately on a window seat in the library and underlining passages from Wuthering Heights while I sip a cup of tea made for me by my wonderful new exchange student boyfriend (who is British, of course).

But... the reality is that it will be much more like the unpacking scenario that happened today. I'll be tired, sweaty, probably alone a lot, and, well... a bit ditzy. (It's unrealistic to think I'll become a level-headed person overnight.)

Regardless, it will be an exciting new chapter, this whole "diving back in" thing. I fully expect this semester to challenge me unlike any semester before. Yet, somehow, that's what I want. Life is far too short to spend it in total contentment. That just sounds awesome boring.

And so, this Blahg post simultaneously ends an era (summer) and opens a new one (school!). I'll be writing a LOT more this fall, especially to rant, whine, vent, and complain about college! *smiles angelically*

Stay tuned, my friends. Sarah Kane is BACK!