Two Truths and a Lie

1. I'm pretty alright at archery.
2. I drowned dramatically during my swim test.
3. I am eating a brownie right now.

Well, if it isn't obvious which is the lie, let me enlighten you on the contents of my day yesterday,

First off, we were at the door at 7:03 this morning- and then waited a solid *twenty minutes* for the bus, which was late because of the boys (again). We loaded all our belongings into the back of a pickup truck and then moved into camp!

*throws party*

It's going to be a giant sleepover in the girls' village tonight!

The rest of the day was, well... Mixed. First we did outdoor survival skills, which was great, because I told all the UK staff to be careful of the local "venemous butterflies" and their reactions were WONDERFUL.

Then we had archery, which, tbh, I felt great about! I hit the target every time- a vast improvement from the last time I used a real bow and arrow, which was 12 years ago. Our fearless leader Ryan even said "good job sarah" and I felt pretty grand about it all.

But then.

The swim test. *scream or terror*

Me and my fantastic friend Demi have been dreading the swim test all week. And it didn't fail us. It was AWFUL. However, contrary to the way I felt, I was alive the whole time. Once done with the swim test, we did a "missing swimmer" drill which involves sweeping the bottom of the lake for bodies. It was a bit dark (literally and figuratively).

And, finally, after a long day of mixed activities, we had a run through of a "closing ceremony". We all lit candles and stood around a blazing fire. We sang. I teared up a bit. It was grand.

After THAT, we all went and hammocked in the forest for a few hours until it got too scary to stay.

Today is our last day of orientation. Tomorrow, our first "day off" begins.

Stay tuned!

Dedication, Dude!

Today at Camp Watia we gathered in the amphitheater with torches, sunglasses, and water bottles to celebrate the dedication of this brand-spankin' new camp. I don't think it quite hit me how special this whole "working at a brand new camp" thing is until I watched men in polo shirts stand up with a microphone and cry while thanking donors. It was truly a touching event, and for the first time we got to practice our camp songs on someone other than the landscaping guys. It was great! 

After the dedication, we kept on our gorgeous new blue staff shirts and went to a lunch in the pavilion, where I worried constantly about spilling food on myself. Had a nice chat with some old ladies. Was told by one of the British guys on staff that I have a "VERY American accent" and then was paranoid all day that I am the quintessential obnoxious American that we all know I am. Oh well.

After lunch, we made friendship bracelets, I organized a pantry, and then made an exciting trip around camp in the back of a pickup truck with some grand camp pals. I almost peed myself laughing and that's how you know I'm having fun. It takes a lot to make me pee. It takes a lot.

Finally, it came time to gather together in the lodge to hear announcements, announcements, ANNOUNCEMENTS - and we learned that we will be moving onto the actual camp property TOMORROW! See, we've been commuting to camp every day from a motel, since construction is still underway. 

Tomorrow, however, I'll be having a giant sleepover with my seven new best friends and I can hardly wait! 

And even more exciting news - my SISTER is coming to camp! *has a heart attack from being overwhelmed* WHAT'S HAPPENING PEOPLE?! She's going to work in the kitchen with Darcy and, well, the only other kitchen staff person. (If you know anyone who needs a kitchen camp job let me know.)

So, tonight I shoved all my stuff back into my suitcase and zipped it up. Out of this scary motel we go, into the scary unknown of brand new, clean, spacious camp cabins. Wink. 

Tomorrow's a new day, kids. There will be a swim test involved which might end badly as water is my kryptonite.

Stay tuned.

Sarah Kane Caught a Frisbee

Camp is going great. Yesterday was my third day here at Watia, and it's only getting more and more fun as the days pass! All our staff are wonderful at getting along and that's amazing considering we only have sixteen counselors! Our superiors are great also-- very high energy and down to earth, easy to talk to, fun to tease, good to emulate. 

I'm loving it! 

Watia is beating my last camp experiences by miles. Perhaps it's because the staff is so small that it's impossible to fall through the cracks. I've been forced to participate in everything AND IT'S GOOD! I've made good pals out of everyone here, and I DON'T just like them because they have lovely British/Scottish/Irish accents! Although that's very nice.

Maybe it's because together, we are creating a culture here at Watia. And it feels good. It's impossible not to be energized by thinking about the outstanding legacy this summer will have, because it's the FIRST summer, and will set the standards and tone for the years following. That puts a lot of responsibility on us inaugural counselors, but it's also freeing in a way, since we aren't working in the shadows of, well, anyone! 

The sun hasn't even dawned yet for this camp. We will be there when it first lights up with life this summer and is revealed to the world. That is a privilege that excites me. 

Oh. And yeah, the frisbee. I caught one today during a stressful game of Ultimate. It felt good. We scored a point. I rejoiced. 

Stay tuned! 

MY LAST. POST. EVER!

Don't cry for me, Argentiiiiinaaa *falls onto her bed sobbing*

I'M. LEAVING!

*runs around screaming with joy* *trips over half-packed suitcase and cries again*

Today has been great. I started out with coffee, an exciting letter from the Air Force Academy (more on that later!) and writing down the addresses of all you stinkers I'm going to write to!

Then I went on a hike with a friend:

 

Then I came home to, well, pack (AKA cry):

 

And now, I'm blogging! Because anything is better than crying packing.

So, Sarah Kane, is this REALLY your last post ever!?

Yes. 

Until I have access to the internet again, and Lord knows when that will be. If we're good friends, I'll write you this summer. YOU can reach me at THIS MAILING ADDRESS:

Sarah Kane c/o Camp Watia

5030 Watia Rd

Bryson City, NC 28713

WRITE ME! WRITE ME! WRITE ME! 

This is the worst post ever, as I'm literally sitting here writing whatever comes to mind. No great writing skill today, but hey. This is important stuff. 

I'm going to go pack now, but I may post something else later. I need an outlet. *SCREAMS*

Eight Weeks In the Woods: What I'm Bringin'

Well, folks, I only have TWO AND A HALF DAYS left in my comfy home in Asheville before I head off into the Great Unknown! I can't wait to spend the next eight weeks as a counselor out in Cherokee, North Carolina. I posted the other day about my emotional packing list, but today I'm going to talk about some things I'm bringing that are a bit more tangible!

* * * * *  

I'm not going to lie. I may have wanted to write this post PURELY because I want to share with the world my AWESOME new luggage. lols.

First off, I found this uh-maze-ing Calvin Klein carry-on at Ross (CK-whore here, nice to meet ya!) as well as this Swiss Gear backpack on *CLEARANCE* online! I got both of them for less than a hundred dollars combined- and these will serve me in my adult life, well after camp ends! (I never thought I'd be this excited about luggage. Is it a grown-up thing, or...?) 

I'll also be taking my Kavu bag for any weekend outings. 

Now, this wouldn't be a blahg post about camp if I didn't show you (part) of my Chaco collection! I was so, so excited to find these close-toed Chacos this year! I AM IN LOVE with them, and can't wait to get them all gross and worn out at camp.

As for CLOTHES, I am trying to pack very minimally - last summer, I brought 15 shirts and probably only wore my favorite 5! I haven't finished deciding what I'm bringing this year, but here are my FAVORITE items. I got four pairs of *amazing* comfy shorts at Old Navy for less than ten bucks a piece! Also shown are my Marmot rain jacket, my REI long-sleeve, and my breakfast themed pajamas I found at Goodwill. (They're the best. They don't make pajamas like these anymore...)

I found these, uhh, really dated "retro" swimsuits at JC Penney. They'll serve their purpose this summer. I'm not too worried about the cuteness factor, as they probably won't last much longer than the eight weeks I have them for. Last summer, THREE of my swimsuits were stolen/disappeared mysteriously out of the staff closet. =/

And of course: 

BUFFS.

Now, my beauty routine is already pretty minimalist, but it's going to be even more paired down for the summer. Here's what I'm bringing, in addition to the obvious stuff.

I'm also going to take vitamins this summer. Last summer, I got really sick towards the end of camp and I'm CONVINCED it's from that awful camp diet of carbs, pudding, and carbs. Oh yeah, did I mention carbs?! It's just not enough to keep this body functioning, so for the first time in my life I'm going to take a multivitamin. #grownupthings #saynotoNOROvirus

Anddddd, of course, there are many more odds-and-ends things I'm taking, including string lights, my bible, some candles, stationary, blah blah blah - but some of the most important things I'll need are this notepad for "blogging", my personal journal, and the ONE AND ONLY BOOK I'M TAKING THIS SUMMER! 

Margot Leitman is my story-telling inspiration - she's a winner of the Moth Grandslam, has two books published, and fills the internet with snark and joy. I'm excited to read this "manual" on story-telling. Hopefully, I can take some of what I'm learning in it and apply it to this blog! I'm glad I'll have Margot with me this summer. She's a kindred spirit, and her wit helps me through hard days. I won't have her videos with me this summer, but I'll have this book! (I've been forcing myself to leave it closed until I NEED a little boost this summer!) 

And this is just some of my favorite stuff that I'm bringing to camp this year. I've yet to start *PACKING* any of it... in fact, that's what I should be doing instead of writing this blog post. But, hey. The closer I wait until my departure date, the more rushed efficient my packing will be. 

STAY TUNED!

A Lie I Like to Tell

Tonight I trekked into the woods to look at fireflies. I walked through puddles and wet pine needles and slick roots and the bright beams of a dozen cell phone flashlights. The chatter around me made me giddy for camp, which is coming so soon... I feel a rush of excitement around people connecting with each other, and that's all camp is.

On the solitary drive home after dropping off friends, the music roared through my car and I belted out "ALWAYS SOMETHING THERREEE TO REMIIIND MEEEE" at the top of my lungs even though only fifteen minutes prior I'd been falling asleep in the passenger seat. These 80's jams are balm to my soul, bringing me back to life after a half-hour of being practically brain dead with fatigue.

This morning I woke up and my first thought was "my coffee is gonna taste so good." And it did. I savored every sip. Even now I'm looking forward to tomorrow's early cup.

So cut to the chase, Sarah, what's your Lie?

My lie is that I'm jaded. Fed-up. "Bitter." You've all heard me tell this lie.

I like to say (or maybe just think to myself) that I've had too much pain in my life to not be totally cynical and hardened. But as I sat in the passenger seat earlier letting the wind catch and lift my hand as I held it out the open window and pondered the miracle of flight, I laughed to myself.

I'm inclined to joy. And hope. And, well, delight.

Can I really call myself jaded when the sight of a single firefly makes my heart jump?

Am I really that fed-up when I still fall asleep happily anticipating the next morning's coffee?

Logically, I should fall asleep pondering all the wrongs done to me, and drift off into the subconscious dreading another mundane day.

Yet, the spongy soil under my feet makes me thrilled and grateful, despite the constant memories of loss. Seeing patterns in the tree branches entices my brain to more creative thought, though I could devote all my energy to trying to figure out why certain things have happened to me. Hearing the comforting, deep laughter of someone I admire makes me ache with love, even though I have no reason to believe they aren't going to somehow hurt me, in some way, some time.

I find myself confused sometimes. Because slowly, but surely, I am becoming happy. Something that seemed impossible even just six months ago. It's funny I'm so happy. To be honest, the evidence leads me to believe life is awful, people suck, and it's all pointless...

But I guess there's something inside of me that hasn't gotten the memo yet.