Love Hour With Cousin Brucie

"Dear Cousin Brucie. Something awful happened on New Year's Eve. Sandra, if you're out there, I just want you to know how sorry I am. I had no idea Evelyn would do such a thing. You are still the woman for me. Always and forever. Come back to me. I love you. Jason."

My family sat silent in the car on the way home last night listening to bizarre, vague callers tell their bizarre, vague stories on Love Hour With Cousin Brucie on the radio.

Cousin Brucie: And up next, a classic for you sad lovers at home! *music begins slowly*
Elvis: Aaaaare you loooonesome tonighhhtt? Do you miss me toonniiiiighhhtt?
My dad: Are you SORRRYYYY WE DRIIIIIFFFTTTTEEDDDD, APPPPPAAARRTT?
Elvis: Do the chairs in your PAARRLLOOORR seem empty and baaaare?
My mom: ....Who has a parlor anyway....?
Elvis and my dad in unison: Telll meee deaaaarrr, are you lonesome tonight?

When I wasn't busy making fun of the song, I was quite struck by these sad lyrics:

Act one was when we met, I loved you at first glance
You read your line so cleverly and never missed a cue
Then came act two, you seemed to change and you acted strange
And why I'll never know . . . 
But I'd rather go on hearing your lies
Than go on living without you.

Geez Elvis. There are other people out there, ya know. All this sad desperation, it isn't good fer ya! This is exactly the kind of thing I've been talking about in therapy. HA!

Anyway, the rest of last night was fun, I went and saw Newsies in Greenville with my sister. It was a great show! There's something comforting about watching guys do ballet and tear up newspapers. It was a really nice treat, because I haven't been to any kind of play or musical since high school.

As for what I'm doing today, I'm going to ponder a bit on the likelihood of having a successful "Heartbreak Hour With Cousin Sarah" radio show. I have plenty of sad songs in my arsenal, and plenty of friends with love-life issues who can call in and provide some shock factor. I'll let you guys know!